Episode 168: How To Bring Your Sexual Fantasies To Life

There’s a pretty big gap between fantasy and reality. In my own research, I’ve found that about 80% of adults say they have a fantasy they’d like to act out at some point, but just about 20% have ever done so before. I’ve also found that only about half of adults say they’ve ever even shared this fantasy with a partner. So how can we get more comfortable talking about our fantasies and incorporating them into our sex lives? In this episode, we’re going to discuss what you need to know! I am joined once again by Dr. Zhana Vrangalova, a sex researcher, speaker, writer, and consultant. She runs a course called Open Smarter, which helps people figure out what type of relationship is right for them using science-based assessments of their unique personality. In our last conversation, Dr. Zhana and I discussed a report released by Ashley Madison called Unbound Love: Sex, Fantasy, and Desire that offers some insight into what people today fantasize about. Be sure to check out that episode as well! Some of the topics we discuss today include: How can we unburden ourselves of sexual shame when it’s standing in the way of our fantasies? How do you communicate about sexual fantasies with a partner in a healthy way? How do you deal with situations where you and your partner have totally different fantasies? What kinds of things do you need to think about and consider before acting on a fantasy? What should you do if acting on a fantasy doesn’t work out the way you thought it would? Make sure to check out Zhana’s website, and follow her on Twitter and Instagram at @DrZhana to learn more. Thank you to our sponsors! Give the gift of year-round pleasure with Beducated! Their library of online courses will teach you what you need to know. Treat yourself or a loved one to a subscription and get 40% off their yearly pass by using my last name – LEHMILLER – as the coupon code. Sign up now at: https://beducate.me/pd2307-lehmiller *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.