#64 What Looks Like Misbehavior Might Be Something Else Entirely with Lisa Shanken

What Looks Like Misbehavior Might Be Something Else Entirely, with Lisa Shanken What if the behavior you're seeing isn't defiance, laziness, or a phase, but a sign of something happening underneath?  I'm Dr. Shelly Mahon, your host. In this episode we sit down with Lisa Shanken, executive functioning coach and founder of Tri-Wellness, to unpack what's really going on for kids who struggle with focus, follow-through, emotional regulation, and independence, including neurodivergent kids and those navigating ADHD, autism, anxiety, and more. Lisa brings over two decades of experience as a health counselor, personal trainer, yoga instructor, and executive functioning coach, and she breaks down how working memory, impulse control, and cognitive flexibility show up in daily life. She also explains why the mind-body connection, emotional regulation, and firm-but-loving boundaries matter just as much as any system or chart.  In This Episode, We Cover The three tenets of executive functioning: Working memory, impulse control, and cognitive flexibility How to tell the difference between a real deficit and “typical” kid behavior The connection between executive functioning and mental health: ADHD, autism, anxiety, and depression The impact of screens and phones on confidence, social skills, and concentration When to seek a neuropsych evaluation The role of emotional regulation in daily functioning, and why sitting with discomfort matters How to act from a loving place while still holding firm boundaries The mind-body connection: how food, sleep, movement, and socialization shape behavior Building independence in kids by giving them real responsibility A Line Worth Remembering “Giving a child responsibilities leads to independence. If you can follow through with the responsibilities I give you, then I trust you to make some of your own decisions. Start small and build on this.” Resources Mentioned & Related Reading Tri-Wellness: Lisa Shanken's practice Social Bloom & Love Bloom: Lisa's programs for building social confidence and relationships in neurodivergent-friendly environments Understood.org: Resources on ADHD, learning differences, and neurodiversity CHADD: Children and Adults with ADHD Child Mind Institute: Anxiety, emotional regulation, and guidance on neuropsych evaluations Smart but Scattered by Peg Dawson & Richard Guare: Executive functioning basics for parents The Whole-Brain Child and No-Drama Discipline by Daniel Siegel & Tina Payne Bryson: emotional regulation and boundary-setting Common Sense Media: Screen time guidance by age